Module 3: Release and Clear
Weeks Reading Material
How often do you think about an area of your house that is cluttered, clothes you have wanted to get rid of, but you keep making excuses not to take care of it? Are there people you need to have a healing or clearing conversation within your life? Could it be something from the past, or something currently happening, that keeps you from engaging with them or deepening your relationship with them? Do you have areas of your life you tolerate, and it just doesn’t sit right with you and irritates and frustrates you every time you think about it? Do you have health issues you are concerned about that you know you need to make appointments for, but you keep using the excuse you are “just too busy?” These, and so many other life situations, prevent you from being fully present in your life because your energy is split. Even though you might think these areas are not bothering you, the longer you don’t address, clean, and clear these areas of your life, this split energy/attention acts like negative energetic cords. Either pulling you backward, keeping you stuck, sapping your energy, your spirit, or accomplishing your goals seems to be hard work and does not seem to flow.
These negative energy cords keep us attached to the old narratives, identities, and life patterns that keep us stuck in that repressive cycle of living a life unfulfilled, disconnected, and without purpose. We deserve to create abundance in all the areas of our lives, and to do that, we need to release, clear, and eliminate to create space for new! Once we fully release the past that is not serving us and clean up our areas internally and externally, we can move forward with the momentum and JOY in our lives we desire!
I understand how overwhelming it can be to declutter and cleanse your physical spaces. I know how scary it can be to have a clearing or healing conversation with someone or speak up for yourself, setting healthy boundaries. I also know how liberating and freeing it is to finally take charge of your life become your own advocate, allowing room for expansion, abundance, inspiration, and excitement for the NEW that will flood into your life!
In this module, I am going to break down how to make time to address these areas of your life so that you CAN have the emotional, spiritual, physical, and mental space for healing and to have the energy to move forward in your life with clarity, vigor, and excitement.
To help you in this journey, you must find ways to make the exercises in this module fun by listening to inspiring music, audiobooks, or a podcast. Also, reward yourself by giving yourself little gifts once the task is complete or having had that clearing or healing conversation. The reward could be as simple as taking a bubble bath that night and allowing yourself to relax and read a book.
Celebrate with a big reward for accomplishing something monumental, one of those seemingly significant areas of your life, by planning something BIG after you have completed the task. For example, go out to an expensive dinner at that restaurant you never thought you could afford. Ask a friend or partner to incentivize you to focus on the scheduled time to work through clearing and decluttering throughout the week. Tell your friend or partner what your goal is, that this activity is an incentive to complete those specific tasks and that completing the task is the only way to earn the reward. If you need extra motivation, have an accountability partner, hold you accountable for that conversation you know you need to have, ask them to check in with you throughout the week.
Where to Start:
Yourself. Becoming your own Advocate!
Let’s start with your health issues or simple self-care maintenance you have been avoiding. Set the timer for 10 minutes and write down everything you have been putting off concerning your health, things you think you don’t have time for, all the things you need to make appointments for. For example, when is the last time you went to the dentist, eye doctor, dermatologist, or, if you are a woman, have you had a well women exam, or for you guys, have you had your yearly physical? Maybe you feel like something is off internally and something that you know traditional western medicine needs to address. Many of the practices and exercises within this program, including Emotion Code sessions, will help address your health concerns from an eastern medicine philosophy. In addition to these Emotion Code sessions, you also need to take care of yourself in all other areas to cover all the bases!
I fully believe a balanced approach of Western medical methods and technologies blended with Eastern medicinal practices provides the most significant healing and recovery opportunity. Once you have made your list of what appointments need to be made, start making those calls to the appropriate doctors, specialists, dentists, etc. KEEP, those appointments! If you don’t have an established doctor, ask for referrals from family and friends that you trust with your health. This is my go-to method when I am unfamiliar with a particular medical approach, I reach out to the network of professionals that I trust and work with for these essential recommendations.
I have an extensive network of both western and eastern medical professionals that have been instrumental in healing and recovery in my own life and the lives of my close friends and family. If you live locally in the Phoenix metropolitan area, please reach out to me for referrals, I would love to help. Once you have those appointments set to address your physical wellbeing, we will manage your personal external spaces.
Your Personal Spaces.
Set a timer for 5 minutes and write down all of those personal spaces you live your life in, ones you want to declutter and clear. Pick the one area that has been bugging you the most that have occupied the most space in your thoughts. We all have that ONE place we look at, and know, I want that cleaned, cleared, and decluttered! Start with that area TODAY, even if you only have 15 minutes or just 5 minutes. When you become intentional with the “Why” you are decluttering and cleaning out spaces, you then create room for new and increased growth, and you will notice you are quick to release what does not serve you, just like what Marie Kondo has repeatedly said, “What doesn’t bring you joy, get rid of it!”
For you, this may be a dresser drawer full of junk, your closet packed with old clothes or shoes you haven’t worn in years, or a nightstand full of old books or notes that haven’t seen the light of day. Or a workspace with piles of paperwork several months old, or a computer desk covered in cables, wires, old notepads, etc. If these areas seem too overwhelming, start small with your wallet, purse, travel or workout bag, or car.
Schedule a time to work on these areas and honor this time. Do not make excuses of who you can’t keep that time allotted for that activity. Set a timer for 30 minutes up to a couple of hours, depending on the task at hand. If it is a big project, break it up into a couple of blocks of time throughout the week. When I work from home, I set a schedule to allow for projects just like this. During my breaks, I put laundry away or tidy other small areas in my house, giving myself approximately 5-10 minutes for the task. I try to be conscious about doing this instead of going on social media, checking emails, etc.
A book that was helpful for me in understanding how to start organizing my house was “Organizing from the Inside Out”, By Julie Morgenstern. She provides incredible insight and suggestions on how to let go and set up the flow of each room in your home and life, and so much more!
Tips for decluttering and eliminating clothing:
If you have a hard time deciding what clothing to get rid of, use the concept Marie Kondo uses, hold the item to you, and feel if the item brings you joy, and if it does not, get rid of it! How does holding onto anything that does not bring you joy serve you? I wear comfortable clothes that I feel I look good in. If you feel challenged in deciding what clothing, colors, styles are best for you, have a friend or loved one be there and help you decide, have that accountability partner.
I had a girlfriend come over when I did this, and she asked me, “If I tell you this is outdated or not flattering on you, will you get offended if I tell you to get rid of it?” I knew she had my best interest in mind. I was so ready to shed some of that old self, and I trusted her. She helped me sort through all of my clothing and the clothing I felt brought me joy; she helped me combine styles in ways that I would have never thought of pairing together. I was excited to learn a new way of combining my old clothes to make them feel new again, with a few added suggestions of new essential clothing items to add to my wardrobe. If you know of a friend or loved one that can do this for you, be bold and ask them for help. This is one of their passions most of the time, and they would love to share that with you.
Suggested other personal areas to clean:
- Purse or wallet
- Work area
Write down all the areas you are wanting to declutter and clear in your home. Get your partner and/or your children involved in creating a list of these areas. Then create a schedule of when and how to get it done together. Choose one (1) area a week, maybe even one every two weeks, and together, choose a day that works for everyone. Explain to each of them why this is important to you and the family. Make a time limit of 1-3 hours for each session, and you will be amazed by how much gets done! I like to call this a Power Hour or Power Session. Getting the whole family onboard, fully present, completing the project together can be simply incredible.
The exercises in this module are to be completed by the end of the six-month program. Just think, in the six months, your whole house will be decluttered, cleared, and organized while you are in the process of cleansing yourself internally! If you find organizing your home a challenge, look up ideas online or hire a professional to come in and help you once you have decluttered and cleared those things that did not bring joy.
Keep a written commitment schedule in a visualize place to keep you and your family on track of how you will complete the whole house decluttering and clearing before completing the six-month program.
Compile a list of the relationships in your life that you want and need to be better. Now, let me ask you, where have you been the victim, a position you took on, that could be the reason why certain relationships are still broken and distant. I know I have taken that role with a few significant people in my life. When I learned to take 100% responsibility for my role in those relationships, and in what way I contributed to them being broken and distant, that is when I found the courage to have those clearing and healing conversations, and reconnect with those important people in my life. I recently learned in a leadership program, one in which was transformational for me, some mindset frameworks which addressed and helped me to have those important clearing and healing conversations. They are as follows:
- If it’s to be, it’s up to me.
- 100% is possible, 100% of the time.
- Live my life as if my life, and other people’s lives, depend on it.
- Be giving and generous.
6 Steps to Breakthrough
- Commitment-What is your level of Commitment?
- Connection- How are you connecting to yourself and those around you?
- Responsibility- How are you being responsible to your own transformation?
- Contribution- How are you contributing to those around you?
- Authenticity- How are you showing up for yourself and others?
- Enrollment- How are you getting others invested in your vision and transformation?
4 Levels of Responsibility
- The Victim Mantra- Life is happening TO me.
- The Duty Mindset- I HAVE to take responsibility.
- The Take Charge Mantra- Life is happening FOR me!
- The Willingness Mindset- I WANT to be responsible for everything, I am the source of this.
There are two lenses to look through:
By saying, I have to take 100% responsibility, you are indicating it is a burden to you.
By declaring, I am 100% responsible, you are freeing yourself from the burden.
I want you to remember the 4 Levels of Responsibility provided earlier. After reading through the mindset framework, reflect on those people in your life you need to have that clearing and/or healing conversation with. You should reflect on why these relationships are the way they are and see if you can remove yourself from being the victim. I suggest, and I have done this myself, write a letter to that specific person, and allow yourself to say and feel all the things you have needed and wanted to say to them. Then read the letter, rewrite it with a new perspective, and include why you want to have this conversation with them, speaking entirely from your heart. You can decide to give them the letter or talk with them about it. Having the letter allows you to fully express everything you have wanted to say, a resource to help you have that clearing conversation. I would also suggest letting them know why you are reaching out to them to set up this time to talk.
By working through your list and addressing those people in your life you need to have those healing and clearing conversations with, you should understand that this process is done throughout the program. Allowing this time will help you get clarity and come to terms with each conversation. The Emotion Code sessions can help you process before and after the conversations. If you need help with these specific steps or how to approach this, we can work through this together.